I’m sleeeepyy and neeed to clean my room and throw away stuff and oommg I have all these small canvases I can’t take with me during the move because the paints aren’t mine so iono what I’m gonna dooo :(
I am fairly convinced that Red Pandas are not real.
The Legend Of Dratini
(if out of sync click the center)
And this why true damage and lifesteal is important.
Gimme a pill that allows me to complete awesome A+ art in 2 hours or less so I can gather up the courage to ask for money with art :(
Thanks.. :( I need lots of hugs as I try to not cry at the library.
*waiting for next bus to hospital to pick up work release slip cause apparently she won’t let me work until I get it*
:| Watch it not be enough for her.. Just like my work paper after my surgery wasn’t enough even though it clearly said I’m not allowed to lift over 20lbs for a week and have to take more breaks to rest up since I still have pain
I’m tired of being looked down upon.
I’m tired of being told “You don’t care” when I make a mistake.
I’m tired of getting the: “wow and you went to culinary school?” whenever I make a culinary mistake(I’m sorry I don’t know everything damnit)
I’m tired of having my age be an issue when I make a trivia mistake(I’m still learning how to be an adult…come on..No one’s really helping but yell at me and expect me to know everything)
I’m tired of having awesome days at work and then horrible days.
I’m tired of starting off good and then make 1 tiny mistake and suddenly everything I do is a mistake.
I’m tired of being told: “you’re pissing me off” when I do make a mistake or I’m slow (come on.. I still have pain where they cut me during surgery.. I can barely kneel down..)
I’m tired of being on the verge of tears almost every day while working.
I’m tired of the guilt I feel because I’m not perfect.
I’m tired of having anxiety almost every day because I know I’ll make a mistake.
I’m tired of when I DO make a mistake and don’t get the “you don’t care” lecture and have to come up with a reason why I keep making mistakes,and I do(which is pretty fucking hard for me because I just can’t mentally think that way..)..but then I’m told it’s not a reason but an excuse and thus get the “you don’t care” lecture once again.
I’m tired of trying to defend myself but only get shut down and have to agree with the lies I’m told about myself even though deep inside I know they aren’t true but I have no choice but to agree to them..
I just want to quit.. But I have 3 weeks left before I move…and it’s not like I can just get enough commissions to make up that $350 I get every 2 weeks..
I just mentally can’t handle this…6 months of this.. 6 fucking months of this bullshit and I keep hoping it’ll get better but it just doesn’t.